I Took a Nap...

Jilly- my little girly girl

Earlier today, when Jilly Billy (she is almost 2) and I got back from dropping Alli off at preschool, I sat on the couch with Jilly and put on a show for her to watch. I was going to start running around trying to get the house cleaned up, laundry done and the dishwasher emptied before my husband got home from his business trip but I did something completely out of character for me.

I fell asleep.

And then Jilly must have fallen asleep too.

I woke up an hour later and started immediately thinking about all of the stuff i had to get done and that I needed to get up, but then I looked down at my baby (well, technically she is a toddler) and thought "who cares about the housework".

What a blissful feeling to have my little girl sleeping comfortably on me- this little person who I love so much was so comfortable on me and felt so safe with me that she fell asleep. Talk about feeling at peace with life and with the world. At that moment I let all of my commitments go- I realized that moments like this, being able to cuddle with my little one, were not going to be something that I can do forever.

I then closed my eyes and we slept for another hour.

You know what? The world didn't end because I put my child's needs first. If anything, I made my baby's world a better place because she got to spend time with me. She was my number one priority and I would have to think that a child knowing something like that does them good.

What I will take from my nap today is that I need to re-prioritize my life. Playing with my kids, cuddling with them, reading to them, talking and listening to them- these are all things that I need to put before other things. Housework will always be there because as you all know- no matter how much you do around the house there is always more to do.

I am not going to let my house go the shambles, but if my son wants to play Legos, or my daughter wants to talk to me for 30 minutes about her teddy bear then I am going to let the housework wait a little and give my kids the attention they crave.

Children are only little for so long and when they are adults they are not going to remember how clean your house was or if you kept up on the laundry. They are going to remember spending time with you.

Arizona?

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My husband is interviewing for a job in Arizona. Yes, the Arizona that is really, super far away from the little state of Rhode Island that we live in now.

He has a great job now that he is excelling at, so if he gets the new job great, but if not oh well. If he gets it we will be packing up all of our stuff, three kids and dog to move from the frigid cold of New England to a place that doesn't have to deal with snow and ice. If he doesn't get it, then when our lease is up here, we will move back to Massachusetts to a town way closer to his work so we are not spending over $250 a week on gas.

I actually think it would be cool to move far away. As boring as I am, I think it would be exciting. Other than living in Georgia for a year before we were married, we have lived in New England our whole lives. New England is a great place, but I hate snow. I also hate the fact that the cost of living is crazy here. I hate the fact that spending $200,000 on a house gets you a fixer upper in a decent neighborhood with high property taxes. 

The only thing making me the tiniest bit hesitant about possibly moving far away is my parents not seeing my kids as much. They love my kids so much and I know it would break their hearts to be that far away. But, I can't live my life on how others are going to feel- I need to do what is best for my husband, kids and I. 

So, yes- moving to Arizona would be fun. But if not, then we'll move near my husband's work which will be about 1 1/2 hours from where we are now. Either way, we'll be somewhere new and either way I'll be with the ones who matter most to me- my husband and kids (but cross your fingers that we'll move to the place that doesn't require snowsuits and ice scrapers).

So It Starts...

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Jilly turned one on November 10th which means this whole breastfeeding thing is starting to wind down.

You see, the one year mark was the time I usually celebrated because my boobs were going to be repossessed from the baby and given back to their rightful owner (me). I felt that way before because with my first two children I knew that there was going to be another baby. This time I know that there won't be anymore babies and while I am happy to be able to have my body back (and ditch the uber un-sexy nursing bras) I am sad that this will officially end my child bearing years. I am sad that my last little baby is growing up so fast and before I know it all three of my monsters are going to be teenagers and hate my guts and think I am the most embarrassing thing on the planet- even more embarrassing than my parents were to me.

Not that I will be off the nursing hook anytime soon though. Jilly is very attached to nursing and has decided that mommy's milk tastes way better than cow's milk. And she also decided that drinking from a sippy cup is for losers- boobs are way better. The process of weaning her is going to take awhile and to tell you the truth I won't mind. I just look down at Jilly when I am nursing her to sleep at night and any stress I am feeling just melts away because at those moments I feel like all is right in the world. Then I put her to bed and go downstairs to find the other two kids beating the ever living crap out of each other and I realize that my sweet little nursling is going to be just like her older brother and sister- God help me.

Dreaming of the DMV...

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Today I finally went to the DMV and got my Rhode Island driver's license. I was expecting a terrible experience because the word DMV seems to be synonymous with hell but it was actually not so bad!

The Cranston branch was well organized and I was in and out in about an hour. The people working there were nice too- except for the guy who takes the license pictures; he was a little creepy. If someone is as old as my dad I most certainly don't want them checking me out- young guy yes, old guy no.

I brought my kindle to keep me occupied while I waited but I couldn't help but people watch and come up with snarky comments in my head. What is it with people wearing their pajamas and sweatpants out of the house? I actually was beginning to feel overdressed in my jeans and t-shirt outfit. Maybe it's because I am home with the kids all day but if I don't put on real clothes I feel like a decrepit piece of crap. Putting real clothes on makes me feel like I am part of the real world instead of stuck in a pile of dirty laundry, spit up and dirty dishes while dealing with three screaming kids. If for some reason I get stuck in sweatpants and or pajamas all day I feel like my soul has been crushed. Dramatic, huh?

I was actually a little sad leaving the DMV because it was peaceful- once I returned home it was back to the whining, screaming kids. Now on days where the kids are particularly annoying I can dream about sitting at the DMV instead of my usual dream of shoveling cow manure.

May the Force Be With You...

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Something I have noticed lately is the more kids you have the less time you have to care about silly things. With each child that emerges from my belly I have less time to linger on trivial things... like an AWOL spider in my bedroom.

Yes, there is a spider in my bedroom somewhere and I don't really care. I am too tired to care and my brain is too mushy after dealing with whining kids all day to care.

Normally I would have taken every piece of furniture out of my bedroom and stayed up all night until I found and exterminated the spider. Let me rephrase that, I would have had my husband take apart every piece of furniture and stay up all night until he found and exterminated the spider. But now I am a mom with three monsters to take care of which is far more terrifying than an eight legged creature possibly crawling on me.

I know that the little guy most likely isn't even in my bedroom anymore- he's probably under a piece of furniture somewhere mocking me for my pitiful attempt at killing him (it involved a light saber and some toilet paper) so even though I am not terrified by his presence in my house I still scan every room I walk into just in case he wants to make his presence known. And if for some reason he is sitting behind me while I am writing this I want him to know that the next time we meet I'll be better prepared, perhaps with a Nerf gun of some sort.

I Hate Spiders...

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Today I had to register my son for Kindergarten. We all piled out of the house into the car and after I buckled the three kids into their car seats I got into the driver's seat and started the car.

I looked to my right and saw a giant spider descending from the roof of the car onto the passenger seat behind my bag. I hate spiders. Spiders disgust me and when I am within five feet of one I start having a panic attack. So it is needless to say that I started to have a mini freak out in my head though I stayed calm because I didn't want the kids to become alarmed.

Many things went through my head, the first being to get myself and the kids the heck out of the car and run far, far away from that dastardly spider. But then I realized that if I left the spider in the car I would never want to set foot in that car again. I sucked it up, ot out of the car, threw my bag on the ground, got a napkin from the glove compartment and stared at my arch nemesis. After much hesitation due to the worry that said spider would jump at my face and bite me if I tried to kill him I squished him.

I was so proud of myself- I felt like I was just the most awesome mom in the world for protecting my kids from a spider. No one else seemed too impressed though, but you know what? Thanks to me there is one less spider in the world to scare unsuspecting moms in their cars.

Super Villain in the Making...

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My son is five and has turned into a pathological lier.

At first it stated out as little lies when I asked if he did something wrong and he said no. Then he graduated into making up lies out of thin air to get his sister in trouble (next time you say your sister hurt you, don't tell me that she bit you but the marks are invisible). To get the truth out of him I use the age old mom weapon of lieing through my teeth (yes, call me a hypocrite if you must). I tell him that I saw what happened so he better tell me the truth or he will be in big trouble (right now the threat is I will erase Plants vs. Zombies from his Kindle Fire). This always works and the truth comes out. Then we have a talk about why lying is wrong and that he needs to always tell me the truth blah, blah, blah. Our conversation never sticks and then he is back to lieing at which time the whole process starts over again- I am hoping someday the lieing is bad thing will stick.

The other night at bedtime my daughter wanted her Kindle Fire to use for a bit (yes, my three year old has a Kindle- I was desperate to get her to poop on the potty and we only paid $140 for it. we got my son some super expensive toy to bribe him to poop on the potty that he doesn't even play with anymore so I figured a Kindle would be a better investment this time around). I couldn't find it so I asked my son if he knew where it was and he said no. My husband and I went crazy looking for it through the whole house and my husband took one for the team and looked through he nasty garbage. I asked my son one more time and with some cajoling he showed me where he hid it- under his star wars helmet on his dresser. Boy, was I angry. I asked him why he hid it and he said that Alli was being mean to him. I told him that was fine but when I asked him where it was he should have told me and then I took away his Kindle as punishment. We had another conversation about why lieing is wrong but for some reason I have a hunch that that one won't stick either.

Someday he'll get it and hopefully it is before he is an adult and I send him off into the world- the last thing I need is for one of my kids to be a diabolical super villain.

Summer Plans...

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Summer vacation is here.

My first feeling is excitement- I don't have to drag the kids out of the house three days a week to drop off/pick up my son from school.

My second feeling is dread- no more school means my son and daughter have more time to fight with each other and drive me crazy.

This summer will be pretty laid back, as in I'm not going to be jumping through hoops to do lots of away from home activities with the kids. Maybe we'll go to the zoo and some other random things but I'm not a glutton for punishment and taking the three kids to big places by myself is not so much fun. Plus, I'm just not the type of mom who feels the need to constantly be taking my kids places. We have a nice yard with a swing set, a huge sandbox, lots of outdoor toys, a bounce house (one of those small little tykes ones) and even a ghetto above ground pool and various sizes of kiddie pools. We also live on a dead end street that the kids can ride their bikes and scooters on and have neighbor kids across the street who are my kids' ages. Sounds like perfection to me and like I should get a big fat honking pass to not have to leave the vicinity of my house much this summer.

As I am not a completely lazy mom, I do want to make it a priority to spend more quality time with the kids. I spend literally all of my time with them but I don't spend enough quality mommy time with them- and here I am talking about the older kids because the baby leaves me no option but to spend tons of time with her. I see us playing board games (their favorite is Candy Land), doing arts and crafts, going for walks, playing games in the backyard and reading together.

I also really want to spend time each day with Ty-Guy working on his letters, numbers and other miscellaneous stuff that five year old kids are expected to know when they enter Kindergarten. Nothing too intensive, maybe just fifteen minutes a day during weekdays. I am going to try on find some resources on the internet on fun things to do that  will prepare him for September.

And maybe, just maybe, we'll be brave and the whole family will go on a little vacation to Story Land. The idea of two adults and three children, including a baby, sharing a hotel room for a few days kind of scares me though.

Too Proud...

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Having baby number three was such a blessing to me. My husband and I suffered a miscarriage while trying to have a third child and when I got pregnant and carried Jilly Billy to full term we were so happy.

When I had my first child the transition was hard- my husband and i had no idea what to expect and it took a bit to get the hang of things. Obviously we eventually did get the hang of things because we decided to have a second child.

Going from one kid to two kids was such a breeze for me. Things just somehow fell all into place and life was good. Once Alli was a year old we decided to have a third child and got pregnant when she was 15 months old. I wanted all of the kids to be two years apart and things were going exactly to plan.

But something didn't feel right- something inside of me felt like something was wrong. Well, something was wrong and I ended up losing the baby. It was such a soul shattering thing to go through, even worse than when I had a miscarriage when my husband and I were first married. I pretty much bottled up my feelings inside and soldiered on with raising my two kids. I felt like I should be thankful for already having two healthy kids and felt selfish for wanting a third. For a brief amount of time I swore off having anymore kids- I just could not deal with the heartache if something happened again.

After a few months of silently mourning I decided that I did want another baby. We ended up pregnant a couple of months later and after a few months of constant worry that something bad was going to happen I made it into the second trimester with a healthy pregnancy and then went on to deliver a full term healthy baby girl. What joy my husband and I felt to have added a beautiful baby girl to our family.

Once I was home from the hospital and my husband went back to work real life set in. The easy breezy days that I imagined did not happen. I felt like an emotional wreck plus my recovery from the c-section was not going well. I felt like I wasn't being a good mom to my older kids, that my house was in shambles because I wasn't keeping up on the cleaning and that I was being a terrible wife to my husband.

I am stubborn and proud and you know what I did about these issues? Nothing. I just went on with life pretended that these issues didn't exist. I was a shell of the person I once was but I was too proud to admit defeat and ask for help.

Was it post partum depression? Now that I look back I think it could have been. I was so overwhelmed by bringing home a newborn to a home with a four year old and two year old already in it that I felt like a crappy mom. I also had all of these pent up feelings about my pregnancy losses that I have never dealt with in a productive manner- it all just added up to me feeling awful and useless. You feel down about your life and then you think about how good you have things which makes you feel more down because how dare you pity yourself when there are others who have it worse than you.

How did I end up dealing with these emotions? Well, it took my husband having a very honest conversation with me to snap me back into reality. The way I had been dealing with my feelings was affecting my family and it was pushing away the one person who had always been there for me- my husband who was the person who I chose to spend the rest of my life with.

Now every day I try to think about what makes me happy- I think about how much i love my husband and how I have been in love with him since we were in high school. I think about how my husband is such a wonderful man who loves me, faults and all, and is such a loving and caring father to our children. My kids can be monsters but they are also loving children who bring joy to my life.

Am I a perfect mom now? Um. no. Like everyone else I take life day by day. I no longer feel like a complete failure, which is how I felt after I had the baby, but I still get a little down on myself at times. Being a mom is such a hard and complex job and I am doing the best that I can do and trying to give myself credit for doing my best at it.

Graduation...

tassels are cool.

Well, today my oldest child graduated from pre-school.

How does the time pass s quickly? It makes my eyes well up with tears when I think about my little baby growing up. The baby that I took home from the hospital and wondered why in the world was I allowed to take home this baby who I had no idea how to take care of is now going to be off to big kid school in the fall.

look, they're not trying to inflict pain on each other...

He has turned from a baby to a toddler to a pre-schooler to a kid. He has his own little personality and his own little friends. This is the starting point of him becoming his own person and him being independent. As a mom I want to hold onto him as long as possible but know that I need to let him go at the same time.

my husband failed to use the zoom feature on the camera so here I am with Ty-Guy in the picture...

My baby is a big boy now but he will always be my little baby who I love to snuggle with and who makes me laugh with his silly ways. He always tells me that he'll live with me forever, and while I hope he moves his butt out by the age of twenty-two it is nice to hear that at his old age of five he is still a momma's boy.

Calling All Cruise Directors...

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I don't fit in with the pre-school moms, which to me is a good thing.

I am old school in the sense of I don't feel like my kids need to be signed up for lots of activities at such a young age and the term "play date" makes me roll my eyes (it sounds so prissy- whatever happened to saying do you want to come over my house and play? are kids these days so busy that they need dates?). And going to a play group or joining a mom group- well that just seems like a torture worse than being up all night with a screaming baby. I have always said that I refuse to be friends with someone just because their kids are the same age as mine- I've sacrificed enough by becoming a mom and I refuse to forfeit my dignity by hanging out with someone that I don't want to.

I am the type of mom who expects my kids to be able to entertain themselves- if someone says that they're bored my response is find something to do. I am not a taxi service or an ATM machine that dispenses countless amounts of money for activities. You want to play with someone? Play with your sibling or if plausible the neighbors. I mean, isn't one of the reasons I had three kids so that they could play with each other? If I wanted to hear boredom whining I would have had just one kid and saved myself a lot of trouble.

When I was a kid back in the dark ages of the late eighties/early nineties I played with the neighborhood kids and I was in Girl Scouts. That was my life. I don't remember my mom trucking my butt all over town for multiple "play dates" every week or signing me up for tons of activities. You know what the neighbor kids and I did? We would climb trees, have dirt ball fights and explore the woods. If I tried setting foot back in the house before dinner time my mom promptly kicked me out.

Now I know some people may not have other kids in their neighborhoods so trucking your kid around to friends houses may be a necessity- but please quit saying "play dates". It is such a helicopter parent term that personifies how this generation of kids is being turned into little wussies who need mommy and daddy to constantly pacify them.

Me, I prefer my kids to know that mommy is not their concierge. I have tons of junk to get done during the day which all pertains to their happiness and well being so the added job of on board cruise director is not something I want to add to my plate right now.

Moms Are Schizophrenic...

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My son graduates from pre-school in a little over a week. When I think of it, I get teary eyed because it is yet another milestone he is going through and one more step towards him being more independent and not needing me as much. I also feel a bit of relief because, well it is one more step towards him being more independent and not needing me. Make sense?

I love taking care of my kids but at the same time I love feeling like a real person and not just a mom whose sole purpose is to put everyone else's needs before her own. While I will miss my kids when they are all in school full time I will enjoy being able to finally breath. In my neck of the woods Kindergarten is half day so my son will be in school full time the year after next, then my daughter two years later and Jilly Billy three years after that (she just misses the cut off of being five to start Kindergarten which is September 1st and she was born in November).

So six years until all of my kids go from being my people to being their own people. While I am impatient for this to happen at the same time I can't even fathom my little babies growing up. Being a mom can be a little schizophrenic at times, can't you tell?

Scream Till You Puke...

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I have come to the conclusion that my quality of life is directly correlated to how cooperative Jilly Billy is at night. For the (brief) period of time that she was taking a nap from 7 pm to 11 pm and then after I fed her was sleeping until 2 am before we took her into our bed I felt wonderful. When I say wonderful I mean I wasn't as crabby to everyone in my house and I didn't feel like I was on the brink of a nervous breakdown every minute of the day. It was nice having time at night to relax and get stuff done like actually making shopping lists that had coupons involved.

Now Jilly Billy is in full crib at night mutiny mode- she will sleep in her crib for maybe, if I'm lucky, two hours and then she's up at 9 pm therefore wrecking any plans that I had to not have a child attached to me all night. I know there is a method of sleep training called cry it out but I'm not into letting my baby scream until she pukes. The most I can handle is her crying for a few minutes- I'll pop the pacifier back in her mouth a few times and then I give up and take her out of her crib. I love her and cannot get myself to let her cry herself to sleep so I sacrifice my night to keep her happy.

This is why I feel like garbage today and the many days preceding today. I put my kids' needs before mine and Jilly Billy is just a baby- babies need to be cuddled and to feel like they are loved. Screaming and puking doesn't do that. So I will continue to feel like garbage while gently prodding her to sleep in her crib all night (heck, even just a few hours would make me happy). My son slept in our bed on and off until he was 18 months old at which time he went right in his crib and slept through the night (we moved from an apartment where his crib was in our bedroom to a house where he had his own room) and my daughter slept with us until she was around 9 months old which is when she decided she was ready for her crib all night. Jilly Billy wants her mommy at night and I know, even though it is annoying the ever living crap out of me, that she will eventually sleep in her crib when she is ready to.

I just wish though that she would nap from 7 pm to 11 pm- three hours at night is all I'm asking for Jilly. Three stinking hours. Then I'll cuddle with you all night. Three stinking hours!

Six Months Old and Ready for Sumo Wrestling...

Six months old, and though I feel like I say this every month, I cannot believe how fast she is growing up.

Jilly Billy is my little sumo wrestler. I think it's comical when strangers ask me how old she is assuming she is older because she's so big and then they look at me (I am five feet tall and weight about 100 lbs) and wonder how little plumper came from me. My husband is 5' 11" and is average weight so Jilly will most likely stretch out so I'll just enjoy her chubbiness while I can- who doesn't love pinching pudgy baby cheeks?

When I look at her and how fast she is growing I feel tears welling up in my eyes. She is our last baby so I will never have these moment back again. I am glad that I had my tubes tied because after three c-sections and two pregnancies with placenta previa I don't feel like it would be a safe or responsible decision for me to have more children. In my heart I know that three kids is the right number for our family but at the same time it makes me a little sad to know that my baby days are over.

The only thing I can do it try to enjoy my Jilly Billy and her older brother and sister because before I know it they will be teenagers and will hate me and think I am the most embarrassing person on the planet. Even though the baby years are winding down there are still so many wonderful experiences for me to enjoy with my children as they grow and one day I'll be a grandma and will get to be around babies all over again- but then I'll get to hand the little buggers back when they get annoying!

No Junk For You!

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(make sure you say the title of this in the voise of the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld, otherwise it just doen't sound too interesting)

When I started to coupon, I mean really coupon, over five years ago after I had my first child I was a complete coupon psychopath. I ran from store to store getting tons of free stuff, some because we needed it and lots because it was free. At that time every blog that I followed was the same way with pictures posted daily of piles of crap that was bought for free or at least 90% off.

Fast forward to today and I have seen a major shift in what people are buying- it seems that many have turned from "if it's free it's for me" zealots into being more intentional about what they bring into their homes. The piles of Pop-Tarts, Keebler cookies and Betty Crocker fruit snacks have diminished into more produce and natural foods. (my view may be screwed though because I don't really follow too many deal blogs and the ones I do follow I have been reading for awhile- I am sure newbie couponers with newbie blogs are more coupon crazy then us old-timers)

I have also been making this shift to feed my family better, though junk still has a special place in my heart and I still let my kids have treats. I'll never be someone who buys no processed food and all organic because there are just some things that I refuse to give up and try telling my husband to quit the soda- that would be total grounds for divorce. I actually looked back on my grocery shopping posts to see if I have been doing good buying healthier food and guess what? I am not full of hot air; I have literally put my money where my mouth is (meat from Whole Foods is killing me but it is a commitment I made and one that I will keep).

At the same time, I don't in any way think that anyone else should do exactly as I do. If someone else want to buy different types of foods for their families who am I to look down on them? I am far from perfect and have been known to be a completely lazy mom so how can I tell someone else that they are terrible for giving their kid a Pop-Tart? There are some morning where I wish I had a giant box of Pop-Tarts to throw at my kids so they would leave me alone and let me sleep for fifteen more minutes. That is actually one reason why I don't buy a lot of junk food- I am lazy and if it's there I will let my kids shove their faces with it, especially on the days where I am feeling overwhelmed being the mom of three kids under the age of five- which actually seems like it's every day. The moms who do buy said junk most likely have more willpower than me and are able to ration it out properly.

Speaking of Pop-Tarts, my mouth is watering right now thinking about the S'mores flavor. Why oh why can't they make a dairy free S'mores Pop-Tart? And if the did you bet your life I would hide the box form the kids, not because I would want to keep the from eating junk food but because I would want to keep them all to myself.

My Little Tonka Truck

I now call Jilly Billy my little Tonka Truck because she is such a chubster. Nothing is cuter than big fat baby legs.

Yesterday I decided to feed her some baby cereal to see if she would like it. I don't know why I had any doubts about her liking it, I mean she is a ginormous little girl. She was wolfing the cereal down as if she hadn't eaten for weeks.

In this picture she is reaching for the spoon and wondering why the heck I would dare take a picture when I should be stuffing her face with food.

I really love this age- Jilly is learning new things every day and is changing before my eyes. Isn't it amazing to think that just 5 1/2 months ago she was a newborn and now she is rolling over, grabbing at toys and smiling huge smiles.

Yeah, I Emailed a Picture of Poop...

Something happened today that I thought would never happen- Alli pooped on the potty. I was so excited and proud of her that I almost cried. I even took a picture of her and her poop and emailed it to my husband at work. I feel kind of lame that things such as my kids toilet habits excite me, my how I have changed from pre-kid life.

The best part is that she did it all herself. I was upstairs putting laundry away and she yelled that she pooped. I ran downstairs because I figured she pooped on the floor (wouldn't be the first time) and to my surprise she was on the toilet. I had given up on pushing her to use the potty- I just put underwear on her everyday and dealt with whatever happened whether it be giving her jellybeans for peeing on the potty or whipping out the paper towels and cleaning pee off of the floor.

Now when it is Jilly's turn to be potty trained I am going to take the hands off approach and let her figure it out. It really just is not worth the power struggles, like the ones I had with my son and then the ones I had with Alli before I gave up and said whatever. If only I could go back in time and give myself this advice, it would have saved me many headaches.

Reminder...

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I really need to remind myself of this daily. It is so hard to not feel stressed about not getting everything done around the house with three kids that I was able to do with only two kids but I need to remember that my kids will only be kids for so long. What I am doing now will shape who they are as adults and will shape the kind of parents they will be (no pressure there, right?).

I need to stop losing my patience, stop yelling (boy, is that hard with a tantrum prone almost three year old drama queen daughter) and stop worrying about keeping up with the housework instead of spending more time with the kids (lets face it- I will never catch up on the housework, never ever).

So housework and laundry, you can kiss my butt. You're not dragging me down anymore, you and your dustballs and laundry piles snickering at me. I'll deal with you when I deal with you and if you don't like it you can go muck up someone else's house.

Three Kids and Two Miles...

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Today I walked two miles with a fifteen pound baby strapped to my chest while pulling a wagon with about 70 lbs of children in it.

My son needed a haircut for his school pictures tomorrow so last night I tried to take him to get it cut but 99% of haircutting places are closed on Mondays. We went to Super Cuts and they had a 45 minute wait- I'm sorry but there was no way I was going to wait for 45 minutes at 4:30 in the afternoon for a Super Cuts haircut (I'm not bashing them- I have been know to get my hair cut there).

My husband was bringing back the loaner car to the dealership today and picking up our new vehicle (long story, I'm not going to get into it because it is just borderline insanity) so I was car-less. I decided that the barbershop wasn't that far away and the kids and I could haul our butts up there the eco-friendly way.

When we got home I felt like my legs were going to fall off and I was dripping sweat. What a workout, though it is one that I hope to never have to do again. I know there are people who do these things everyday but I am glad that I am not one of them. I am far too lazy and dependent on my vehicle for such silly things as walking to get errands done.

I do feel proud of myself though that I was able to accomplish the task, especially since here in Massachusetts it was 75 degrees out. But now what I feel like doing is curling up with a frozen margarita and drinking the sore muscles away (I'll have to settle for a soda because I doubt my nursing daughter would be cool with contaminated breast milk).

She Is a Tank...

This is Jilly Billy at about one month old.

This is Jilly Billy now (4 months old).

It is completely amazing how much changes in three months of baby time. My once scrawny little newborn is now a tank. It's good that she's a tank though because even at this young age she is going to need to be able to hold her own against her older brother and sister.

It's survival of the fittest in this household though I fear once the baby gets older the hostile natives will gang up on me instead of each other.