Monday, October 15, 2012

Raising Snowflakes...

Helicopter
photo credit
When I was pregnant with my first child I thought that when he was born I was going to be one of those overprotective parents, mostly because my mom was that way so I just figured I would be too.

Well, as it turns out I am actually pretty laid back. I have never freaked out about every little hiccup and most certainly was not one of those moms who had the pediatrician on speed dial to call at 2 am when a child had a mild fever. My kids have bumps and bruises from such things as falling down and trying to beat the crap out of each other. And when we are outside I don't hover over them- I just let them play and do what it is that little kids do. I even let my five year old play out back with his friends without me being out there (the playground is about twenty feet from our back door and we have two huge windows facing it), I just open the windows and check on him every few minutes.

I want my kids to be independent and not always look to me to fix their problems. They know I am here if they need me but they have enough confidence to do stuff without me hovering over them and nit picking everything they do. Obviously if I see them doing something dangerous I intervene, but playgrounds aren't exactly strewn with danger so I'm not too worried.

When I see parents who are the hovering type I laugh, and then get annoyed when they're hovering involves my kids. If you want to coddle your child, please don't feel superior to me because I choose not to turn my child into a little wussy snowflake. Standing over your child and telling them to not do this and that is not being a good parent- it is setting your child up for failure in life. If you are always there to pick them up when they figuratively fall down then they are not going to know how to pick themselves up. When children figure things out on their own they become so proud of themselves and it instills confidence, which spills over into all aspects of their lives. As a parent, seeing the beaming expression on my childrens' faces when they accomplish something on their own makes me so proud of them and it warms my heart seeing how good they feel about themselves.

In all of the infinite ways that I am probably a terrible mother, I at least have enough sense to not be a kooky, hovering helicopter parent. I want to raise my monsters to be self sufficient adults, or at least to not be living in my basement after they graduate from college.

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